There are said to be 4.7 billion people in Asia today. I understand that I am just one of them, but I have never felt so insignificant until I landed in Beijing in 2011.

So many people. Everywhere I went, there were people. Not one or two, a group of people were in sight all the time. I wondered where all those people came from. Before that, I had thought their one-child policy was extreme, but I understood it would have probably been a necessary measure. 

It was almost at the end of my trip back from New York where I left a few weeks ago. Since China Airlines offered a better price to stop in Beijing than ANA’s direct flight to Osaka, I decided to spend a few days in the capital of one of the most populated cities in Asia.

I checked into a small hotel in the city centre. Since I’ve shipped back most of my belongings from the apartment in New York, I barely had much stuff with me — some clothes, shoes, amenities, a laptop and a notebook in one big suitcase.

I did all the touristy things to do in Beijing; Went to see the Great Wall, Forbidden City, Palace Museum and Temple of Heaven. All of those places were massive and grand scale. My feet hurt after walking through the Summer Palace. 

It felt strange that no one knew or cared about me despite I was among so many people. I wondered what would happen if I decided to erase my trace and disappear. I was able to do so if I really wanted to. I believed my family and the Japanese government would try to find me, but I doubted if the Chinese authorities would be too keen to search for me. 

That idea scared me, but at the same time it had me think what kept me not to do so. 

In fact, I still wonder what keeps me from that idea to this day.