“Go by yourself”, mom said to me.

“Nooo!” I resisted. “I want to go swimming, but not by myself!”

It was a beautiful hot summer day in 1993. It seemed to be the best day to be in the water. It was right in the middle of summer vacation, and there were still a couple of weeks until school starts. I was bored. Unfortunately, all of my close friends were out of town. So I asked mom to take me to the swimming pool nearby. But she told me to go alone.

“Honey, I’m busy. I don’t have time to go swimming with you.” Mom told me while she was folding a cleaned laundry.

“You are old enough to go swimming by yourself. You have been to the community pool number of times. And some kids from your school must be there.”

“Who knows? Maybe there isn’t anybody I know!”

“Then make friends with someone there.”

“No…”

I was disappointed. I really wanted to go swimming, but I was too hesitant to play solo. I have never gone out by myself before. What if my classmates saw me alone at the swimming pool? They would think I don’t have any friends to hang out with. What if I come across with the boys I don’t like? The idea of going out alone seemed too daunting.

“Come on, off you go. Take 500 yen from my purse. You may get a snack from the convenience store on the way back.”

Mom sorted out the clothes to the closet and hurried me.

I reluctantly picked up some coins from mom’s purse, put my swimmers and towels in my vinyl bag, and went out to the street.

When I got to the swimming pool, the place felt bigger than usual. The pool seemed wider, longer and more crowded. Not knowing what to do by myself, I walked around the edge of the pool.

“Oh, hey, Chiyo!”

A boy at the corner of the pool waved his hand at me. I recognized him. His name was Kuni, and we were in the same class last year.

“Hey, how are you,” I said to Kuni.

“Didn’t know you are here. Wanna play a beach ball with us?” He said. He was with other kids from his class.

“Yeah, thanks”, I said and jumped into the water.

It was really fun to play with a beach ball with the boys. After a while, I took a break on the poolside. I lay down on a beach chair and looked up the sky through my swimming glasses. I felt like an adult. I felt very independent.

“Chiyo?”

Two girls stood by me and asked. I rose my upper body up. They were from a different class.

“Oh, hi,” I said to them.

“Did you come by yourself?” One of the girls asked.

“Yes, I brought myself,” I said.

“That’s brave.“ The girl said.

“Yeah, that’s cool. I don’t feel like coming if I were alone.” Other girl said.

“I thought so too. But here I met Kuni and others, and I met you two as well.”

“You wanna have ice cream with us?” She asked me.

“Why not!” I smiled.

It was just a summer day, but it was a memorable day for me. It was a day I learned that I can go anywhere by myself if I really want to. Surely it was daunting at the beginning, but it turned out great. I enjoyed my little adventure.

I have come a long way since that summer day. But every time I feel intimidated by something or someone, I remember that day.

My life goes on with or without accompaniment. I’m thankful for my mom for teaching me that.